"I SAW THE IMAGE OF THE LORD" - Sis Jane Anne

I thank God for this great opportunity to share my testimony with you. I trust that this will bless everyone. God has been very good to me for He has held me despite of my being unfaithful.

I am your sister in Christ, Sis. Jane Anne Dela Cruz-Barrido, from Quezon City Congregation, Philippines and the only daughter of Sis. Dada Valdivia. I am happily married for 3 years now and blessed by a 1-year-old baby boy.

I have accepted Christ as my Savior during my early age. I felt in my heart that I received salvation and God helped me every step of the way. The peace I had in my heart was really incomparable. Nothing was sweeter than having Jesus in my mind, heart and soul. As a Christian teenager, I never indulged myself in doing worldly acts. I was a picture of a real Christian, got a long hair, long dress, no worldly arrays, which made me noticeable, not in the sense that people will admire me but rather criticize me for being prim-and-proper. It wasn’t easy for me for I was with them everyday. I was tagged as an old-fashioned woman, the lady who wears skirt all the time. I was able to bear all these things for the Lord. I knew I was not the only one experiencing this and this wasn’t even a bit of what Jesus has suffered for my soul. But because the devil has worked overtime on me, my faith fell because I experienced an eros love with the unbeliever. I started to lie in word and in deed. My heart slowly sought the works of the world. I had a haircut and I wore clothes which are not pleasing to God. I also uttered sinful words. My heart was gladdened by the admiration and compliments of the people. I forgot to live with Christ and for Christ. I found myself drifting afar from the Lord. I was living my own way and the peace that once resided in my heart was gone. I tried to search it myself but to no avail. The heaviness of my heart remained in me. My mind was frightened by the thought that Jesus might come while I was still departed from Him. I was afraid to die for I knew I was not going to heaven. My punishment would have been greater because I once accepted Christ but I had forsaken Him for some unworthy reasons. This fear tinkled in my solitude. I even had sleepless nights. Though I knew that the only way to overcome these is to humble myself to God, confess my sins and ask for forgiveness, I was hesitant to do so because I gave more importance to the things which I cannot give up for Christ.

Despite of my being unfaithful to the Lord, He has never left me nor forsaken me. I finished my studies, reached the peak of my career at an early age and we never lack materially. He has blessed me with a loving and responsible husband and a healthy baby boy which I wanted. I have seen the never-ending goodness of the Lord but never did anything enough to repay Him.

On Sunday morning of July 2, 2006, between 9:00 to 10:00 A.M., an amazing experience happened to me while I was cutting the grass in our small lawn. I felt a strange feeling. I was walking back and forth, I could not explain how I feel, it seems like I was sad but quite excited about things I don’t know what. I was restless, anxious and upbraided by my conscience. It was hot but I feel cold. I was strong but I feel tired. I sat down again and continued to cut the grass. After a moment, it seemed to me like I was unconscious. To my amazement, I saw the image of the Lord in my left side (as I am facing the left) while I was cutting the grass. I bowed my head, I could not face Him straightly. He was wearing a vivid, bright white dress, much much whiter than the snow. Nothing in this world could match the brightness of His clothes. His face has no form, it was just shining very brightly. His shape was like a man but a spirit floating in the air. He was close to me but rising a little higher than me. I have heard His voice, it was a soft, heavenly, masculine voice. He spoke to me and told me, “I have given you all the things that your heart desires, what is the reason why you are not coming back to me yet? What if I get one of your loved ones?” After a while, I saw my husband having an accident in his job at the ship. Then I saw my son who is really ill, my mother being confined at the hospital and my grandparents are also ill and weak. After seeing all of them, I regained myself. I have seen this vision like I was watching a television. I was totally awake. I was really frightened and my tears flowed abundantly down my cheeks. They are all very important to me and I don’t want to loose any of them untimely. I went to my room and wept deeply asking for forgiveness. I cried and repented with all my might for hours. After giving up my life to God, I have risen up like a new creature. I received His forgiveness. The peace was overflowing in my heart. The joy was real. I was relieved of heaviness and the Lord left a promise that He won’t take away my loved ones from me. I was unworthy of His love but though, He chose me to see Him.

I have seen His glory. It was real, my brethren. His warning frightened me so much because before He showed Himself to me, my husband actually met an accident at the ship (as he is a seaman). He had a chemical burn on his arm. My son was also having influenza. He was born prematurely. He was really thin and small. My mother on the other hand is suffering from breast cancer and diabetes mellitus for years already. She was working for the Lord at Samar province at that time when she felt an extreme pain due to her breast cancer. I did not know at first what happened to her. But because I gave my life to God again, I am holding on to His promise that I won’t loose my loved ones untimely.

The Lord has planted in my heart a strong burden for the young people. It is my desire to follow God’s will, wherever He may lead, I will follow. May He use me in His vineyard with my little knowledge and ability.

(I give thanks to the Lord for the miracle He did to my life. To God be the glory forever and ever. Amen. )

The Distress Of A Backslider - by Sis. Jane Anne

Umaga na naman... umpisa na naman ng panibagong araw. Kahit inaantok pa ako, kailangan ko nang bumangon. Paano kasi, mahuhuli ako sa trabaho. Malayo pa ang byahe ko. Mahirap pang sumakay. Nasaan na ba ang tuwalya ko? Dapat na akong maligo, magsipilyo at magbihis. Kung minsan ay hindi na ako makakain dahil sa pagmamadali. Makikipaghabulan na naman ako sa oras.

Ilang minuto na lang, alas otso na. Nandito pa ako sa jeep. Tensiyunado na naman ako kasi baka hanapin ako ng boss ko habang wala pa ako. Sana hindi niya ako tawagin.

Kailangan kong magmadali sa paglalakad at pagpasok sa silid ng opisina. Hinihingal na naman ako pagdating sa mesa ko.

Ano na nga ba ang uumpisahan ko? Ganito naman araw-araw ang trabaho ko, bakit ba nagtatanong pa ako. Ang magtrabaho sa maghapon at mapagpanggap na ngiti ang laging gawain ko. Pero syempre kailangan kong mag-break paminsan-minsan para sagutin ang text ng minamahal ko. Susunduin niya daw ako mamaya at kakain kami sa labas kasama ng aming mga kaibigan. Siya na lang ang kasiyahan ko. Masaya kasi ang may nagmamahal.

Alas singko na. Araw-araw ay ito ang aking hinihintay. Sa wakas, tapos na naman ang oras ng trabaho. Maghahanda na ako para sa pag-uwi. Makakasama ko na ang aking mahal at ang aming mga kaibigan.

Masarap makipagkuwentuhan at makipagtawanan sa mga kaibigan. Kahit kababawan lang ang paksa ay ibayong halakhakan. Masaya kasi ang maraming kaibigan.

Pagkatapos ng isang masayang hapunan, kailangan ko nang umuwi. Malalim na kasi ang gabi. Baka nag-aalala na ang mga mahal ko sa buhay. Isang mahabang byahe na naman ang aking lalakbayin pauwi sa aming bahay.

Pagdating ko sa bahay, tulog na ang lahat. Pero ang itinirang pagkain para sa akin ay nasa ibabaw pa ng mesa. Pagod na ako. Matutulog na ako kasi maaga pa ako bukas. May pasok na naman ako.

Araw-araw na ganito ang litaniya ng buhay ko. Ilang taon na ba akong ganito? Ahh... matagal na rin pala. Nakakasawa na. Mayroon na ba akong naipon sa bangko? Wala pa rin pala. Kailan ko ba maba-budget ang oras ko? Palagi na lang akong nakikipaghabulan dito. Masaya nga ba ang may minamahal at may nagmamahal? Bakit umiiyak pa rin ako sa gabi bago matulog? Masarap nga ba ang marami ang kaibigan? Bakit pakiramdam ko ay nag-iisa pa rin ako? Bakit naaawa ako sa sarili ko at may di kawasang takot sa pagkatao ko? Bakit ba ang dami kong "bakit" e alam ko naman ang sagot.

Kailan ba ako huling nanalangin? Hindi ko na maalala. Ayaw kong pag-usapan ang tungkol sa Biblia kasi makikita ko lang ang sarili ko. Tinatanggihan ko Siya dahil hindi pa ako handang sumunod sa kalooban Niya. Kailan ba ako magiging handa? Hirap na hirap na ako at nabibigatan pero bakit ito pa rin ang pinipili kong buhay?

"GOD DO YOU CARE?"

I was born in a parsonage. My father had pastured the city Church of God. He and mother prayed that God would give them a daughter-a daughter who would play the piano and sing. When I was born, they rejoiced and named Joyce.

I loved music and before reaching my eight year, I knew that I wanted to be a concert pianist. I wasn'tleaving God out-and yet I was! I sang and played in Church, but I was not really saved. My supposed Christianity consisted only to a list of “do’s” and “don’t’s”.

At the age of fifteen, I told my parents, “Let me love God in my own way. I don’t want to be a Christian fanatic”. I thought I could run my own life and in case of emergencies, God could “help me out”-but I must not be hindered in my ambitions.

I put my career at the top of the list. Then I found a man I could love. When he asked me to be his wife, my ready answer was there. We started our home, we thought on the promise of loving God. We both become active in the church. Eighteen months later came our blue-eyed Ricky. Two years later, lovely Laurie joined our family.

A handsome husband, two lovely children and a singing career should have been enough to make any woman happy, but I was mistaken! I was neurotic and miserable. Our marriage, only years old, was in trouble.

I couldn't convince Dick my husband that I enjoy and love my career and I have to continue it. He insisted that I should care for the children; wash dishes, and keep the house clean. That caused all our troubles.

By this time, neither of us was devoted to God. Our prayers were stopped. We talk very little with one another. Our hearts were far apart and never discussed the real issues of life.

Soon there was no hope and I knew it. There was no love-only hate. I was disgusted for living. I was through!

“Hell could be no worse”. I hated by stubborn, good looking husband. I didn’t like being a mother. Life became just one horrible day after another. I decided that suicide was the only way out. I got a razor blade and as I lowered the sharp blade, ready to slash my wrist, the telephone rang. I let it ring; it kept ringing. But the caller was insistent. I picked up the phone & answered, “Hello”. She was the Christian Young lady I met when singing for the Christian Youth Festival and said, “I don’t know what you are doing, Joyce, but whatever it is, stop and listen to me”. Sensing that I was not in the mood to listen, she shouted, “Joyce, the Bible says, having done all, to stand”.

She was still talking as I slammed down the receiver. I took the razor blade again, intended to end it all. But my strength was gone.

I put down the razor blade and asked, “god do you care about me?”.

The Lord answered with a Bible verse I had learned as a child, “the Son of man is come to seek and to save that which was lost”.

In the living room I dropped to my knees by a chair and prayed, “Merciful God, forgive me. I know now you care for me. I might have committed an unpardonable sin by taking my own life”. The Lord showed me that I have rebelled against Him, my parents, my home and children. Tenderly He spoke to me, assuring me that I was forgiven of my sins. I rose to my feet a new girl, a new Joyce Landorf!

A question came to my mind, “But what about Dick? Can love once dead live again?”

I was cooking supper when Dick came in. I turned off the oven, with a joy of tears, told him what happened to me. He moved closer and put his arms around me also with tears of joy. “Joyce”, he said. “I want to tell you about the miracle that happened to me also today. With the words of a defeated man on the envelope I wrote, “To Joyce: when you find this letter I will be dead”.

“But Joyce, as I sealed that letter, the Lord said, “Dick suicide is not the answer. I am the answer. I am all you need. I will give you abundant life.

We both knelt down in prayer, thanking God for His restoring mercy.

From than on, Dick and I with our lovely children live together happily in our home!

MARY MADE ME PROMISED

She was our only child. At the age of six years, Mary gave her heart to Jesus. After that memorable gospel service, she hurriedly went home. I was still in our sala when she came. I saw on her face an unspeakable joy which she never had before. Immediately, she embraced me tightly and said, “Ma, I have given my heart to Jesus and He has received me. I know deep in my heart that I am now a child of God. Now, Ma won’t you give your heart to Christ also?”

I replied, “I hope I shall sometimes, my dear. There is still plenty of time for me to do that”.

“But MA, you can do it now!” she urged me with all her childlike earnestness, “you can do what I did in the chapel. I knelt before God and surrendered my sinful life to Him. I confessed my sins and I am sure He had forgiven me, I know it down in my heart.”

Again, I said to Mary, “Don’t worry my child about me, I will tell you when I’ll come to Christ.”

Mary knew my character. She was sure that if ever I make a promise, I carefully fulfill it. So time after time Mary would tell me, “Ma, promise me, accept Jesus now.”

I replied, “I do not like to promise my child, for fear I shall not fulfill.”

Her request was urged to me at times for nearly six years till a serious sickness came to her. I did not know that Mary had to sacrifice her life before I will consent to her pleadings.

Many times during her bed-ridden condition, I told her in the most gentle way, that her sickness is so serous and I am afraid she will go at anytime. But she will answer, “No Ma, I can’t die till you promise me to come to Jesus.” Still I was unwilling to make a promise less I should not keep it.

I told my child, “I intended to give my heart to Jesus sometimes, but not now.”

Mary grew worst and finally had uttered her last words, “Promise me, Ma?” I love my only child and wept bitterly as I stood watching the countenance of my dying child who seemed to say to me, “Ma, promise ma and let me go to Jesus.”

There was a great struggle in my heart, “If I do not promise Mary now, I never can next time.”

The Holy Spirit worked in my heart to yield. I told Mary, “My child, I will give my heart to Jesus.” That was the last bolt to be drawn. My heart was opened and Jesus entered at once in my life and felt the joy and peace of sins forgiven.

The change in me was so marked, I felt constrained to tell the good news to Mary, that she might bear it with her when she will go to live with Jesus. I called her attention once more, “Mary I have given my heart to Jesus and He is my Savior now!”

How patiently was Mary to pray to God for six long years and pleading with me to give my heart to Jesus? As my statement of accepting the Lord came to her listening ears, a peaceful smile lighted up her face, and not being able to speak, Mary raised her little pale hand pointed upward seeming to say, “Ma, we shall meet up there!”

Her life’s work was done! She was able to lead me to Jesus! What a great mission! I should have been the one to lead Mary to God, but she was the one who led me to the Savior.

My heart was filled with peace, though Mary is gone. I felt very anxious that her father should also accept the blessing which I have found in Christ.

As my husband and I went into the room where the remains of Mary to God, but she was the one who led me to the Savior.

My heart was filled with peace, though Mary is gone. I felt very anxious that her father should also accept the blessing which I have found in Christ.

As my husband and I went into the room where the remains of Mary were resting, I said to him, “Husband, I promised our little Mary that I would give my heart to Jesus and I did. Now, won’t you promise also like what I did, to give your life to Christ?”

We felt the presence of the Holy Spirit in the room. He brought conviction to my husband. He took the little cold hand of Mary in his, knelt down and prayed saying, “Jesus I am accepting you as my Savior, forgive me of my sins. I want to go where my child have gone.”

Mary’s remains were laid in the grave. Though our hearts were full of sadness, yet we felt the love of God in our lives, knowing that one day we will be united with our loving child in heaven.

Is there not some loved ones pointing down from heaven and saying to you, “Give your heart to Jesus.” I believe there are. She may be your mother, your father, your brother or sister, or your child, or any of the saints who have gone before. They are all waiting for us on that beautiful shore, where the sunset’s no more.

Mary accomplished a marvelous work, she made me promised to come to Jesus and I did.

d # u r calling cannot be reached - By Sis. Raquel Ricamara

Ellow….Oi abalang abla ka ah…pudpod n ang mga daliri mo s paki2pag txt s mga Kaibigan at mga ktxtm8 mo,prng my nka2limutn k atng ireply,o sdyng ayw mo lng Pnsinin ang txt nya sau.Hindi mo nga sinisave ung # nya dian s cp mo.

Pero alm mo hnggng ngaun naghi2nty p rin sya ng response mo.Sinubukn k nyang twgn ngunit binblewla mo p rin ang twg nya,dhil nd mo p i2 hndng sgutin,my mga bgy k p n gus2 mong gwin .Ayw mo png isuko ang lht s knya,ablang abla k s mga bgy n maka2pag psya ng srili mo.Lgi k p rin nyang idindial dhil s ayw mong mais2rbo nd mo lng ikinancel pingptyn mo sya.

Tnung q lng mka22long kya yng mga dhiln mo s huling arw,sa tingin nd dhil ang lht ng yn ai wlng kbuluhn,ipa2hmk k nyn.Smntlng ung ngttxt,2mtwg sau ngunit ayw mong sgutin,sya ung ngma2hl sau ng lubusn.Ang buhy nya ibinigy n sau,ngtiis sya ng hirap pra pra lng sgutin mo lng ang twg nya,nd k ny iiwn,ni pba2yaan mn,22o un mniwl k.At ang lht ng nsa knya ibi2gy nya sau, ang knyng kharian…

Sna lng hbng mron k png load,bttery,signl,at ayos p ang cp mo magreply k n sa knya
Sgutn mo n ang twg nya..cge k ikw rin bka ang ors n kung keln k ngttxt s knya sya nmam ang nd mgreply sau,O d kya kpg ikw nmn ang 2mtwg at kailngng kailngn mo sya
Mrinig mo n lng “d # u r calling cannot be reached….”